So I've been watching a lot of Miss Marple BBC productions (Geraldine McEwan rocks!) and reading a cozy mystery series with a knitting them written by Maggie Sefton. I've never wanted to learn to knit until, oh, five or six days ago. I figured that if I can teach myself to run a 5K, I can figure out this knitting business. I persuaded Dave-O into taking me to Michael's (yarn sale!) and spent about $15 bucks on bamboo knitting needles and a sack full of yarn. I went home and watched about 2 hours worth of knitting demonstration videos online. Then I started crapping kittens because, holy shit, this knitting stuff is complicated.
Yesterday, I decided I needed to face my fear so I turned on Scarface, grabbed a ball of yarn and my needles and taught myself to knit. Yep, that's right. I learned to knit while watching Scarface. I'm big on balance, you know? Knitting fits in the sweet old lady with a bajillion cats and curious sherry sipping habit. What's the exact opposite? Bingo. Tony Montana.
Right about the time Tony takes his trip to Cochabamba and meets Alex Sosa I finally figured out the purl stitch. By the time Alex called Tony back to Bolivia to discuss his tax evasion charges and their, uh, problem, I'd managed a few nice looking stockinette and garter stitch rows! When Tony shouted his iconic line (Say hello to my little friend!), I'd knitted a third of one wonky-ass dishcloth.
The only real problem I've encountered is Bosley. He seems convinced that knitting is the devil's work. You should try knitting with a Great Dane hovering over your lap, salivating, barking and snapping at your needles. Not cool. I sort of wonder if he saw me looking at those Great Dane sweater patterns...
As much as it pains me to admit, I'm really loving this new knitting hobby. It's oddly relaxing. It's sort of like meditation, you know? Focus the front of the mind on a mundane task and all that. Still, it's sort of depressing. I mean, Dave and I spent Friday night reading and knitting side by side on the couch. Ohmigod! We're so LAME!
Friday, January 23, 2009
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