Ignorance

So Dave often comes home rather irritated and frustrated by some of the comments uttered by his colleagues. You'd think in the 21st century folks would have moved beyond racial epithets and sexist remarks, but yeah, not so much. Shockingly, the bullshit Dave has to listen to seems to be increasing in frequency and jaw-dropping what-the-fuckness. What kind of remarks, you might ask?

Well, how about this gem. One of Dave's coworkers was ranting about the N-word who worked for him or his family.

Dave: What is wrong with you? Man, you shouldn't say that.
Coworker: What's wrong? You married to a colored woman?
Dave: No, but my wife is Hispanic.
Coworker: Ah, that's all right. Nothing wrong with a little jalapeno in your diet.

What. The. Fuck. How is that acceptable? When Dave relayed that tidbit to me, I laughed at the utter dickishness of the remark but, seriously, it's upsetting. In my lifetime, I've heard more than my fair share of that sort of crap. It's just disgusting and so stupid.

Lately, a lot of the conversations at Dave's workplace have centered around Barack Obama and his race. If the asshats Dave works with aren't tossing around the N-word, they're calling Obama a terrorist or an Arab. I'm astounded by how fucking ignorant so many of these people are. I mean, seriously, do I need to go down there and show these bastards a map? These assholes think Obama's Kenyan father makes Obama a terrorist and an Arab. Uh, what? Last time I checked, Kenya is in Africa and Obama ain't a terrorist. Even if he were a Muslim that wouldn't make him a terrorist. Hell, I know more vile Christian extremists than Muslim extremists. It's always so amusing to me how many Christian folks spew such hateful rhetoric about Muslims without realizing *they* are just as horrible and spreading just as much fear and propaganda and terrorism.

But, really, the thing that upsets me the most about all this racist bullshit is how Dave and I will never be able to bring our child or children to the firestation to see all the nifty fire trucks and ambulances that kids love so much. Why, you ask? Because when Dave and I adopt later this year or early next spring, we'll be adopting an African American or biracial child. I refuse to have our kid exposed to that kind of disgusting ignorance. I just won't fucking have it. I always wonder if those dickheads ever stop to think about how their comments affect Dave or their other colleagues who feel outnumbered and are afraid to speak up. Will they understand how painful it will be for Dave to hear a black person referred to as a jigaboo or jungle bunny or N-word when our child is (or will be) African American?

Look, I'm not naive. I know that people say hurtful things. One of Dave's family members sent a a horrible text message to us the other night that was supposed to be a joke. We didn't find it funny. Do I think this person is a racist? No, but obviously, they didn't show very good judgment. Will I keep my kid away from them? No, but I'll probably always sort of wonder if they're really as accepting as they say they are.

My dad says things sometimes that make me cringe. I know a lot of it comes from growing up during super turbulent times but he's trying really hard to change. My cousin and her husband are also in the process of adopting a likely biracial or fully black child so Dad got the talk from Mom months ago when they started the paperwork. A few weeks ago, Dad referred to MLK day in a derogatory way but immediately apologized to me. I can't imagine that it's easy to change ingrained habits but he's trying. And that's enough for me. I don't doubt for one second that my dad will love our child just as much as if he or she were biological.

I guess I'm just frustrated with people who display such ignorance and hatred without ever considering the consequences. And I feel sad for them. They'll live their pathetic lives cloistered in their homogenous circles, never fully participating in the diverse wonders of their communities. They'll sit around eating the same old shit, reading the same old shit, watching the same old shit and never realize they're missing out on some of the most awesome and extraordinary foods, holidays, books, music, and films. And friendships that could change their lives.

Sad. Just so fucking sad.