Monday, November 12, 2007

Hell In A Handbasket

So Dave-O sent me this link for this Dante's Inferno Test. Basically you answer this questionnaire and when you're results are tabulated it tells you which level of Hell you would be sent to. Dave received Level 1 which is Purgatory or basically Summer Camp for Sinners minus the ice cream sandwiches and midnight gropings behind the infirmary. All of his friends were in the 1-4 range it seems. And me? Well. Funny thing...

I've been sentenced to the 7th Level of Hell. I was shocked. Am I really that deviant? I mean, I've had my fair share of fun in my 24 years of life, but the 7th Level? Really? Jeez. I guess that just proves that bookworms really are naughty.

Speaking of HI-larious links! Check these out!

Test your vocabulary skills and earn free rice for the UN!

Take a peek at some truly hideous 1970s Catalogues. Jesus, Maria y Jose! Are these things tacky or are they tacky?!?!

Hiatus

I've been on a self imposed hiatus for the last few weeks. I've got deadlines out the whazoo and if I give myself just the tiniest bit of time to mess around with my blog I always end up on Perez Hilton or some other place I really don't belong. That said, I haven't the foggiest idea of how to pull together my list-o-blog topics. I'll just give a list of entertaining snippets.

I was supposed to spend the weekend with Ash but Dave decided to bring home some vile throat plague on Thursday. Since Ash is uber-preggers it would unbelievably irresponsible of me to expose her to this horrid pestilence so I chose to raincheck on the weekend I’ve been looking forward to for weeks.

Ash has decided that no self-respecting WASP-ish wife can have a kitchen lacking a rooster. We decided that kitchen rooster didn’t have a very good ring to it so we settled on “Kitchen Cock” instead. I quite like the sound of that. At any rate, Ash found her very own Kitchen Cock in Hobby Lobby. I can’t wait to see it.

Ash and Ryan have chosen a baby name. I would announce it—but Ash and I had this big huge discussion about a certain SCRUBS episode and I don’t want to be the one to jinx it. (In that episode, Turk and Carla are discussing baby names and decide on Tiger and Angie, I think. Carla forbids Turk from telling anyone their names in fear of ruining them. Turk, of course, tells JD who ends up suggesting the name Angie to a group of pediatric patients who are playing with a hamster that was removed from a kinky patient’s, uh, well, you know. Anywho…Carla and Turk overhear the kids calling the ass hamster “Angie” and Carla loses it.) Since Ash would cut me if her kid’s name is applied to an ass hamster, I shall remain mum.

Bosley has gotten huge. No, really. Only problem: he doesn’t seem to realize that he is the size of a small horse. He still thinks it’s totally OK to squish himself onto one couch cushion which usually entails pinning me into the other corner of the love seat. He’s also become rather possessive of me. Today Dave and I were sitting on the loveseat while we reconciled our checkbook and updated our financial spreadsheets. Bosley planted his huge bohonkus right in front of Dave and made the whiny “I have to potty” noises until Dave finally got up to let him out. Funny thing—Bosley didn’t have to potty. He just wanted Dave to get up so he could hop onto that cushion and lay claim to me. It’s not as romantic as it sounds… This is yet another reason why Dave has given Bosley the new nickname “Coitus Interruptus.”

Sara graciously donated some super awesome oak bedroom furniture to the "Furnish Our New House" project. Can I just tell you guys how AMAZING Sara looks? No, really. She was, like, glowing. Seriously. Radiant. I haven't seen her like that in a long, long, long, long time. And I totally heart her new haircut. I'm sure it's not that new but it's new to me, lol. Oh, and I can't wait to see her Halloween pics...

I’m ¾ of the way through a new novel and putting together a list of prospective agents. I’m also revising a novella for my editor and polishing a pair of smutty tales for submission near the end of the year. If all goes as planned, I should have 3-5 new novellas/novels contracted for next year. All in all, I’m busy, busy, busy!